Emotions

Emotions. All of us are bound to feel it everyday of our lives. There are many different kinds of emotions: happiness, sadness, frustration, love, rejection... We can choose to either accept these emotions, or bottle up all these emotions inside. The key is in our hands, and it's up to us to decide which door to open.

There comes a time when we are thrust into a situation where all the emotions come at once. We are then forced to deal with these emotions, some of which we have been bottling up for hours, days, months, even years... We then show these emotions on our faces, feeling it in our souls. After that, we realise that this is very freeing, very liberating and our body and mind feel lighter.

Recently, my family and I have all been thrown into situations where we are forced to deal with our own emotions. Now thinking back, all those different situations helped us grow as human beings. I, in particular, matured a lot during this year. I was forced to deal with a lot of my own emotions, many of them which have been bottled up inside my heart for a long period of time. However, after all this, I realise that I can now move forward with my life more matured and feeling confident about myself. I've accepted these emotions and can now move forward with my own life.

The subject regarding emotions has always been a very sensitive and complex one. Some people don't even want to talk about it, while some just want someone to listen to them and give them some advice on what to do. But ultimately, the decision is up to ourself.

XOXO,
Audrey Leow

Technology in the 21st century

My friend just recently got his own iPhone 4S. A part of me is jealous of him, but my rational self is telling me to calm down and to tell myself that if I work hard, I might be able to get one new smartphone of my own before I go UK.

Sometimes when we see people's new phones, tablets or laptops, we seem to be amazed at these few things:

• How rich their families are?
• How hard they must have worked to get that?
• How many games they are going to be able to play with that device?

Most people always make the assumption that all people who can afford the latest smartphones, tablets and laptops must be rich, but most of the time that does not seem to be the case. Many people save up money to buy that particular gadget, sometimes taking up months of their salary. They have to make sacrifices to get what they want. Plus, money doesn't just drop from the sky...

That was evidently true when I finally got my iPod touch 4th generation. At first, I wanted just a normal Sony MP3 player to become my portable music player. I didn't even cared what brand it was, as long as it could store music and play them anywhere I want. Actually, now thinking back, I really was quite humble at that time. Then it took me about 2 years to finally grow the balls to tell my parents that I wish to buy a new MP3 player for my birthday. And the funny thing was that they agreed... I wasn't expecting that. Normally parents would say: "Haiyo, you still got your laptop right? You can listen music from there what?! And then your handphone some more can store and play music... No need to waste money lah!" But then this time, they amazingly agreed that it was okay for me to get my MP3 player for my birthday present. On my birthday, we actually went to the nearest shopping mall to shop for it. Then coming to a Mac store, I wanted to just go in and have a look. I never wanted to have an iPod touch, but then suddenly my dad was like: "Hey Audrey, why not you have an iPod touch instead?" Instantly, I was filled with joy, but didn't want to show it to my parents because I wanted to appear mature. But at the end... You guys know the outcome to that story, so I'm not going to tell.

Nowadays, technology seems to have taken over our world. We have televisions, computers, laptops, smartphones, tablets... You can't walk down the street without seeing someone holding an iPad or someone playing with his iPhone. Samsung is climbing up the technology ladder, and currently HTC is also doing the same. Some smartphones even have genders now, for example the HTC Rhyme, which is specially tailored for females. This just shows how much our society has evolved into a technology society. One that is only concerned with their handphones, tablets and laptops.

I for one, think that even though technology helps us to move into the future; one should always never forget about the past, how the past has helped to mould us to who we are today. We have to be very grateful to our ancestors for that. Human relations are also equally important as technology, or if not, more important. We should always spend the time to care about other people, instead of just staring into our gadgets and minding our own business (MYOB)...

XOXO,

Audrey Leow

P/s: Dad, mum, I want a new smartphone! Best before I go to UK! Thanks! :P

Many sleepless nights

These few days (and nights), I find that my body clock is all screwed up.

I tend to feel sleepy during the day, and feel most awake at night. Or sometimes worst case scenario happens, I feel sleepy during the day and night! And then I get nothing done correctly because I'm just to sleepy to pay attention!

My day starts at 7.00am almost everyday, and I wake up tired. This is due to me staying up late the previous night to study or to finish all my incomplete homework, which sometimes still end up incomplete. Then going to college tired, I have to force myself to stay awake and pay attention in class. After college, I'll sleep on the way back and then reach home, and sleep again for like 1-2 hours. Then wake up and get ready for dinner. After dinner, it's studying until the wee hours of the morning again...

Sometimes it's not that I want to study until the wee hours of the morning, but it's just that I can't sleep until that time in the morning! Maybe because I took damn long naps in the afternoon...

So how do I fix that? Trying to regulate my body clock with more stress doesn't really do much of a favour. Maybe I should try forcing myself to sleep? Definitely no sleeping pills! I hate using them to sleep, rather use some natural methods.

So right now, I can't sleep yet. It's like 12.04am and I'm still awake. I won't say wide awake, but awake alone is fine. Hopefully I can sleep soon, so that I can wake up tomorrow feeling refreshed.

XOXO,

Audrey Leow

Rejection

Rejection. It's an expression that many people around the world interpret differently. Some people think that it's the end of the world, others might think that it's God way of saying that you're not meant for this......

However, what's really important is not how others treat rejection. It's how you yourself treat it. That really depends on whether you're optimistic about it, or pessimistic about it. If you're optimistic, the rejection could mean that probably this is just not the one for you, and that probably this is God's way of telling you that you'll be better off doing something else. If you're pessimistic however, it's a whole different story altogether. Getting rejected could mean your whole world has shattered, crumbled underneath your feet, and that there's no more hope for you. It's all over for you...

Recently I just got rejected by the university which I applied to. I really wanted to be able to go to this uni, and was waiting for a hopeful reply from them. After days and nights of checking, I finally saw a word there which I believe would change my life: "Unsuccessful". That word itself gave me mixed emotions. Part of me want to just shut myself in my bedroom and cry, and also figure out what could go wrong. Another part of me was like: You know what, this is not going to stop me. I have many other offers that other unis have given me, and I can't go down due to just one rejection.

Sometimes life is not a bowl of ice cream. A famous Dale Carnegie once said that: 'Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.' I truly believe in that, and that quote alone has helped me through some of the toughest rejections in my 18 years of life. So I'm going to treat this rejection as another one of those stepping stones. They are there to trip and make you fall, but the ultimate decision to get back up and continue walking is your own. 


XOXO,

Audrey Leow